Depression

This piece I decided to use one of my main experimental materials for my paintings that I make myself… breastmilk. Yup it’s weird but it’s been a hugely transformative and interesting material to use. And it still blows my mind to think about the fact that my 🧬 is in my art literally. I used it in this piece to represent my own experience of postpartum depression after having my daughter. Aside from my fathers death and other losses, I experienced a death of self becoming a mom. I was 31 by the time I had my daughter and thought I knew myself fairly well… turns out I didn’t. Exploring the depths of depression whether it’s temporary or chronic takes extreme courage and requires a lot of support. Left untreated devastating things can unfold. I chose to paint about it so that it can start to shift the stigma and create a space for people to open up and share. I’m incredibly grateful for the therapists and coaches I’ve worked with over the years who’ve shown me a light on my path to come out of depression. It can be a swirling vortex that feels like getting caught in the current of the ocean and repeatedly getting bashed against the ocean floor by your emotions and thoughts. If you struggle with depression get help, you’re not alone and help is available, you just have to ask.

Prints available by request ! email maezystardust@icloud.com

In the summer of 2019 I started writing haikus because all of my poetry/free form prose were too long to enter into writing completions. This one sums up my learnings from my time in group therapy at kaiser in the spring of 2018…

Haiku #2

To heal you must feel

Emotions all the way though

Then you can let go